Hi, I’m Adam, and I’m an alcoholic. Um, I’ve been sober since I was 17. Um, I knew I had a problem pretty early and I dealt with it because I didn’t wanna wait, and I knew it would just get worse. I felt pretty solid after I stopped drinking, I stopped coming to as many meetings, but lately I haven’t felt so solid anymore so… I had this girlfriend who at first I didn’t like very much, or, I didn’t take her very seriously, I guess. She just seemed like, you know, a piece of ass. But she was persistent, man. And she just hung around, and hung around, and showed up at my place—and gradually, it started to feel better when she was there. It wasn’t “love” the way I imagined it. I just felt weird if I didn’t know what she was up to or whatever. And I liked knowing that she was just gonna be there, and warm, and staying the night. And she acted like I was teaching her everything. About fuckin’ history, about sex. She didn’t know what street Central Park started on, or how to use soap. And I showed her. And I wanted that chance to show someone everything. But she changed her mind about me, and it was that fast. I’m so exhausted. Okay. And I’ll bring cookies. I don’t really like cookies that much so don’t get mad if I bring the wrong shit.